Shoeless Muntazer

The best thing George Bush has ever done, and I mean ever, is dodge those shoes-- but if I threw them, one of them would have found its target, and I'll tell you why: Muntazer al Zaidi missed because there's very little snow in Iraq, and so it stands to reason that Muntazer had very little snowball fighting experience, because if he had, he would have perfected the time honored high/low tactic, and he would have lobbed his first shoe, thrown it weak and high like a wounded bird, and while Bush watched it (thinking to himself: that's hardly a throw . . . because A-rabs don't play good old fashioned throwing sports like baseball and football, they just kick things around . . . forgetting that at Andover, he himself was cut from the baseball team and had to become a cheerleader) and while W. was lost in thought, staring up at the shoe floating in the air, that's when I would have whipped the other shoe at him.

4 comments:

rob said...

and *that* would have been the best thing you ever did.

rob said...

would be, would have been, is, would have is...whatever. shame you can't find an english teacher when you need one.

Dave said...

nothing more useful than the imperfect past participle of the subjunctive tense . . .

Anonymous said...

And we in the Russell household are well acquainted with your throwing prowess... do you recall chucking plastic containers of bubble solution at the ass of the horse pulling the carriage for our going-away following our wedding? You hit him dead on, a few times as I recall.

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