Earlier in the week, my friend and colleague Terry was sitting morosely in the English Office (as he is wont to do, we don't call him Eeyore for nothing) and he said to me:
"Liz just called me a dick, in front of our homeroom!"
I asked him why this happened and he said:
"We've got this stupid rubber doorstopper and I couldn't get it to work because you have to fold it over or something and after she showed me how to do it, I said 'I still don't like it,' just joking around and she blew up at me!"
I said that was odd and maybe she was upset about something else-- she was teaching an extra class and had a lot of different preps and maybe she was just in a bad mood-- and then for the sake of Denise, who was also in the office and hates all men, I said:
"You know, not everyone is as calm and rational as us in these kind of situations"
and then I went on my merry way
the next day, Liz said to me, "I don't want you taking Terry's side before you hear the entire story" and so I gave her a recap of what Terry said happened and then-- because she has a dramatic bent-- Liz acted out what happened-- or what she thinks happened-- and it was a bit more compelling than Terry's story . . . apparently Terry is the extra teacher in the homeroom and he doesn't contribute much to running the show-- and Liz claims he was hunched over the doorstopper, fooling with it and muttering and complaining for like five minutes-- and she showed him how it worked but he continued to complain so she told him to "fuck off" . . . and she did admit she got pretty pissed-- which can certainly happen to Liz, who generally exudes school spirit and positivity, but when she's confronted with enough masculine fatalism she can lose it-- longtime fans of this sentence may remember when Liz kicked me out of the department because I did not want to "dress like a holiday" . . . and now, coincidentally, I share homeroom with Haim, the guy who prevented me from redeeming myself in that debacle . . . anyway, something happened between Terry and Liz in homeroom and the catalyst was a rubber doorstopper . . . the rest is shrouded in a profane mystery.
3 comments:
Classic Terry
And what a rabbit hole today’s SoD is! I clicked on the “dress like a holiday” link and it led to more links and more links and stories about Dave being a Grinch and his assigning Dewey Decimal numbers to people and then a comment about Twelfth Night and Dumb & Dumber being linked and a promise to explain in a future sentence and so I did a minor search of subsequent SoD posts and that led to stories about Dave ogling his wife and Courbet’s Origin of the World which I googled and it’s good 19th century porn paint and did your know that 5 years after Dave posted about it they discovered who the model is (https://allthatsinteresting.com/courbet-the-origin-of-the-world-model) and this was all fascinating like a good blog post is supposed to be but I’m pretty sure Dave lied and never actually revealed the link between Twelfth Night and Dumb & Dumber.
ohh boy, you met your dave quota . . . in 12th Night, Sebastian goes with the hot girl he doesn't know into her castle but at the end of dumb and dumber, lloyd and harry do not follow suit with the swedish bikini team-- leads to a good discussion of gender double standards, etc.
interesting about courbet painting . . .
Post a Comment