Sentence of Dave
The Required Amount at the Prescribed Rate (Handcrafted From the Finest Corinthian Leather)
Another Trip to Sea Isle, Another LeCompt Show . . .
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It was Sunday night and we were on vacation in Sea Isle City, so-- of course-- we were at the required LeCompt show, and while we were tak...
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This Sentence is about . . . Something
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I listened to Harlan Coben on Freakonomics last week, in an episode called "How to Create Suspense" and he was so engaging that ...
All Apologies
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To the young lovers cuddling on the lifeguard stand and the lady combing the beach for shells and the the man driving the sand sweeper, I ap...
The Long Goodbye
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I am cleaning out my side room so I can expand Greasetruck Studios, but getting rid of the piles and piles of books I've acquired over t...
Tragedy of the Commons (and Consciousness)
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If you want to listen to something scary and frustrating, Planet Money 640: The Bottom of the Well is the one for you . . . or you could ju...
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Game of Thrones and The Peltzman Effect
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While listening to an old episode of Freakonomics , I learned about The Peltzman Effect , which asserts that when things become safer, we...
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Another Time, Picnic!
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I know people are on vacation and someone out there is planning a picnic, but it's still nice to have a rainy day once in a while . . ...
I Need to Read Something With Jokes
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The Last Coyote is the fourth book in Michael Connelly's Harry Bosch series, and it is a dark and existential one-- think True Detect...
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The Test Has a Logo!
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Our podcast has a new home on Podbean , and Stacey designed an awesome logo . . . so play along, keep score, and listen for special g...
The Infinite Picture Skit!
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During my epic adventure last Saturday , at the Bond Street Bar and Grill in Asbury Park, a group of good-natured folks at a table near th...
Free Apps!
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Everyone is designing a phone app these days, so if you want in on the action, here are a few of my ideas: 1) dog to Spanish translator; ...
They Alive, Dammit! It's a Miracle!
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If you haven't seen the Netflix original Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt , then the plot is a hard pill to swallow-- Kimmy and three other ...
I'll Do It Her Way . . . Grudgingly
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My wife was oppressing my creativity the other day; she was being very critical of how I put away the silverware --my method, which is a mat...
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Warning: Blood and Irony Ahead!
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I was opening a box of band-aids in order to tend to all the cuts on my toes (from when I dropped a bottle of beer at the Ween show and some...
Notes to Self After a Day of Complete Idiocy
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When the sun rose on Saturday morning, I was feeling good about myself and the new day dawning . . . after breakfast I went and played some ...
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More Dreams!
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If I can't swing being a professional dog-walker when I retire, perhaps I will be an impersonal trainer, and inspire people to keep in ...
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You've Got to Have Dreams
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When I retire, I'm going to augment my pension by being a professional dog-walker!
Personal Inspection
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I took the van over to the DMV on Route 130 to get it inspected, and I got to ride in the passenger seat while the guys did their stuff . . ...
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More Nostalgic Reading
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Stephen King's recent novel Joyland is a little book with some big scenes-- it takes place in 1973, at a haunted amusement park and ...
Live Vicariously Through Dave!
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For all of you folks that have to work in the summer, here's a quick recap of my family beach vacation in Sea Isle City: 1) for severa...
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Looking Through My Mechanic's Son's Eyes
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One of the most important things in modern life is to know of a good car mechanic, which I do . . . but he's getting older . . . luckily...
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Kurt Vonnegut Holds Up
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When I was in middle school and high school, my two favorite authors were Kurt Vonnegut and Stephen King-- I read everything they wrote; b...
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Save $$$$ with Statistics
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Diligent readers may remember the risk assessment I did about the tree limb hanging precipitously over my back yard . . . when I first saw ...
The Test 5: Everyone Fails
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Stacey administers a test on acronyms, abbreviations and nicknames and we all do quite poorly-- including, ironically, Stacey; so give it...
Funny? Or Not So Funny? You Be the Judge . . .
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I had a wonderful student last year in Composition class who was smart and outgoing and engaged and curious and generally wonderful to be ar...
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Dave Loves Chick lit! So? What Are YOU Going to Do About It?
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So what? . . . so Dave loves chick lit . . . so he's read three Liane Moriarty novels about Australian moms . . . does that make hi...
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Shallow Thought #6
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Since the advent of the smart-phone, there has been a spike in people stepping in dog-shit.
What's Better Than One Serial Killer?
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Two serial killers, obviously-- The Dollmaker and The Follower-- and though Michael Connelly's third Hieronymous "Harry" B...
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OBFT XXII
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Another fantastic Outer Banks Fishing Trip on the books . . . thanks again to Whit and the Martha Wood and everyone else involved; here are...
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Shallow Thought #5 (Toga! Toga! Toga!)
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In ancient Greece, every party was a toga party . . . and I know this is weak, even as a shallow thought, but I'm still recovering...
Smart and Tasty Mollusk Creates Ethical Dilemma
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I didn't finish Sy Montgomery's book The Soul of an Octopus: A Surprising Exploration into the Wonder of Consciousness . . . it ...
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Shallow Thoughts #4
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Polo would be more like soccer if the horses were autonomous and didn't have people riding on top of them, directing them where to go.
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Shallow Thoughts #3
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Soccer would be more like horse-racing if all the players had little monkeys perched on their necks and the monkeys whipped the players in o...
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The Test: Episode 4 . . . Take It and Get All Sweaty!
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This is my favorite episode of The Test so far; Cunningham, Stacye and I revisit "number sense" and things get fairly absurd . ...
Shallow Thoughts #2
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Sometimes I eat so much at lunch that I feel like I won't be able to eat dinner, but when dinner finally rolls around, I'm hungry ag...
Shallow Thoughts
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If you find an old snorkel at the beach, you can use it as a backscratcher (even if its pink).
Hey Jazz Dogs! It's The War and Peace of Dope War Books!
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Once again, while my family was enjoying the sun and sand, I read about drug wars and torture : The Cartel is part two of Don Winslow's...
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The Test Outro: We Had a Good Time (Until We Didn't)
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Though my inspiration for this song was Sam Quinones' book Dreamland , which details America's opiate epidemic, the lyrics worked...
The Test . . . Episode 3!
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We tighten things up on Episode Three of The Test . . . the introduction is shorter, the theme song is clearer, and we cut to the chase f...
L'esprit de la voie des genoux?
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The French say l'esprit de l'escalier-- which translates as "the wit of the staircase" and refers to when you think of th...
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This Is How I Roll (and Spill)
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If you spill a bunch of coffee on your shirt on the way to the gym, even if you're a minute from your house, you don't turn the car ...
Welcome to Welcome to Nightvale
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Reputable people kept telling me to listen to the podcast Welcome to Night Vale , but I kept thinking: do I really need to start following t...
Spring Cleaning = Explosive Diarrhea
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The Great Island Trail , which is just west of Wellfleet, leads to one of the most scenic spots on Cape Cod . . . high dunes divide Wellf...
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There's No Emoticon For This One . . .
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After my father sent his burrito back for the second time (because it wasn't hot enough) and asked for more sour cream, even though we a...
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A Good Book To Read in Winter (in Norway)
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Jo Nesbo's Norwegian thriller The Son starts dark and gets darker . . . you travel with an incarcerated, nearly broken, drug addicted, o...
1967: Year of Contrast
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A fact thanks to Dan Carlin's podcast Common Sense : the Summer of Love was also The Long Hot Summer of 1967 . . . so if you were hang...
Droning About Drones
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Don't worry, this isn't going to become a niche blog about RC quadcopters, but I would like to report that just after my son Alex...
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A Drone Miracle
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My son Alex was determined to fix his broken quadcopter drone, so he ordered a tiny two dollar motor from China, waited a month for it to ar...
Podcast of Dave! And Stacey! And Cunningham!
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For a full description, head over to Gheorghe: The Blog , or-- if you're brave-- just dive in and listen; but Stacey, Young Cunningham a...
Dave Prevents a Race Riot With an Allusion to Mean Girls
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I was showing The Manchurian Candidate to my senior Composition class and I promised them a scene where Frank Sinatra does karate, and at s...
Bonus Sentence: The Lorax Needs to Write This Article
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Here is the Star Ledger article about the car chase that started on our street; apparently a local dude was caught with drugs that he was i...
Three Bands: Three Long Songs (with occasional breaks for profanity)
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The Stone Pony Summer Stage is a great place to see a concert: there's a beach breeze, it's not too loud, the shows begin early (doo...
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Blood, Knife, Tooth, Sink . . .
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Imagine seeing this vivid tableau soon after your son lost a tooth; you walk into the bathroom, and there's blood spattered on the white...
Can Duct Tape Really Fix Anything?
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Yesterday afternoon, a bit after six PM, Ian and Catherine heard a loud bang on our front lawn-- they were in the kitchen-- and so they ran ...
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We Can't Spare a Square
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The final message of Michael Tennesen's book The Next Species: The Future of Evolution in the Aftermath of Man is that humans are pr...
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Don't Mention This Hypothesis to My Wife (or do it when I'm not around)
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I'm not going to say this out loud, because summer vacation has just started-- which is awesome-- but the house does get disastrously me...
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There's a Fine Line Between Pedant and Douche-Bag
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For the past few years, I've been correcting certain people over the grammatically correct usage of lie/lay . . . not all people, just ...
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There's a Fine Line Between Stupid and Clever
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When my wife watches Christiano Ronaldo play, she always makes a comment about what a beautiful man he is, and I think that's fine; on t...
My Wife and Kids Outdo Me . . .
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The boys and I were quite proud of our short film A Day Without Mom , which we presented to Catherine on Mother's Day . . . but that...
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Not Quite a Dream (But Just as Stupid)
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Fans of Sentence of Dave know exactly how I feel about dreams (they are stupid and I don't want to hear about them, even if I was in t...
How to Be Interested in Politics . . .
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I've been listening to Dan Carlin's political podcast Common Sense and while each show is a detailed and logical look at a specifi...
Meta-Dinosaurs Fight Ghosts of Dinosaur Past
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For the most part Jurassic World operates as billed: plenty of dinosaurs, plenty of cheese, and plenty of eye-candy (i.e. Bryce Dallas H...
Rare Combination: Helium Balloons and Anger
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I turned from getting some cash at the Wells Fargo ATM and saw something wonderful stomp down the avenue: a woman in a denim skirt with an i...
Greasetruck Likes Food!
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After a series of barely tolerable songs about obtuse topics (time travel, the Olympic theme for snowboarders, psychedelia in the desert, ...
Hooray for Learning! Boo for Humans! Hooray! Boo!
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I am reading two books right now, and it's like riding a mental rollercoaster; one is called How We Learn: The Surprising Truth About Wh...
Mea Culpa?
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Martin Seligman, who wrote Learned Optimism , asserts that it is mentally healthier to sublimate rather than ruminate-- if you suffer a setb...
Governor Christie, Try Cracking One of Those Old-Fashioned Books Of Which You Speak
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Governor Christie makes some interesting claims in this video, including the opinion that teachers are "getting paid a full time ...
Pool Anxiety?
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My friend and colleague Kevin recently exhibited what I believe is a new mental disorder-- and not only did I identify this disorder, but I ...
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This One is For You, Ben Franklin
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Fellow English Instructor Kristyna was Appalled at the Lack of Capitalization in her Students' Essays -- her Students Claimed that unlik...
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Brains are Very Silly
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Every semester, I show my Creative Writing classes the Monty Python and the Holy Grail scene where the knights discover Joseph of Aram...
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Just In Time?
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When I pulled up to the gym on Tuesday, I saw flashing lights, a fleet of police cars, and an ambulance-- all parked in front of the dollar ...
Totally Hypothetical Situation
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So a friend of a friend of a friend asked me about a situation-- and he said the situation is completely hypothetical and in no way, shape, ...
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Dreamland: You've Got to Try This Shit
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You might find it ironic that I'm pushing a book about drugs this hard, but Sam Quinones non-fiction tour-de-force Dreamland: The Tru...
Dave Enjoys Chick Lit!
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There are definitely some emotional womanly feelings in Liane Moriarty's novel The Husband's Secret (and some passages about marria...
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Two Questions, No Answers . . .
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Two questions I have been pondering: 1) does possessing a smart-phone make this generation of youngsters more adventurous with travel and ...
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Kids Need to Learn Stuff
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Recently, I've been a font of wisdom for the young people: I coined a new aphorism about poison ivy for my oldest son-- leaves of three,...
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The Universe Likes to Shoot Spicy Stuff into My Left Eye
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Monday at lunch, when I opened a container of salsa to put on my taco salad, some of the salsa shot into my left eye-- but I scoffed at the ...
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Not Quite Eternal Recurrence
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By June, I really start to feel like Phil in Groundhog Day . . . but (fortunately) the school year ends whether I perfect my attitude towa...
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World's Most Talented Dad!
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Initially, you might be impressed by my younger son's ability to simultaneously hula hoop and catch/throw a football, but after a mo...
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Horticultural Aphorism Revision
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We've all heard "leaves of three, let it be," but my new and improved adage about poison ivy is even more vital-- my son Alex...
4 comments:
Sometimes Parenting Gets Weird
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Usually, when we go somewhere as a family, I drive (because I can't do much else in the car or I get motion sickness) and my wife tells ...
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