Sentence of Dave

Sports can often be a weird exercise in futility: you practice and practice but never get to use your skills in the perfect situation (unlik...

Though I'm using an extremely small sample size and only anecdotal evidence, I am officially declaring that the Fitbit Craze is now over...

Usain Bolt might be fast enough to inflate all four of his car tires to the recommended PSI in one three minute session, but I always fall a...

I have a short window of time (30 minutes) between the end of the school day and soccer practice, and my house is right next to the middle s...

I had an incredibly "realistic" dream last night that I ran for governor (absurd) and actually won the election (ridiculous) and t...

This week on The Test, I challenge the ladies with a rather grim thought experiment (thanks to Chuck Klosterman) and while they perform adm...

My friend and colleague Stacey has to sort out a morbid holiday dilemma . . . she made a family-photo Christmas card last year, printed a st...

They should write the color of the clothing on the tag.

J. D. Salinger waits until chapter five to reveal that Holden Caulfield's brother Allie died of leukemia-- and this is an excellent char...

When I first enter my classroom in the morning, the amount of time I spend opening difficult to access windows-- actual glass windows that I...

It looks like the desktop computer and digital audio converter in my makeshift music studio have finally bitten the dust . . . I've resu...

I recognize the absurdity of a blog about nothing commenting on a TV show about nothing, but Seinfeld is actually about everything (and ...

Stacey brings the pain this week on The Test with her quiz on nicknames, and Cunningham and I mainly flail-- especially when we are trying ...

I take in pride in entering crosswalks without glancing at the oncoming vehicles-- I'm not going to deign to "ask permission" ...

When people at my place of work--mainly women-- are talking about contacting spirits, receiving signs from the afterlife, and decoding messa...

Everyone knows that Kilgore Trout is Philip K. Dick, right?

I'm too tired from Two-practice-Tuesday to think of anything creative and interesting to write, but I did write a piece (with multiple s...

This event happened Friday afternoon, but I totally repressed the memory-- I told no other human about it, and it would have sunk deep into ...

Here are four things I recently "fixed" and/or "installed" with duct tape, instead of doing the job properly: 1) I &qu...

The ultimate existential dilemma is not "to be or not to be" nor is it "is the bathroom very very wet after my children showe...