Sentence of Dave

This morning, Alex decided that he loved my company so much that he was going to bar the door so that I couldn't leave for work-- but af...

As far as I can tell, any policy or strategy that is bi-partisan is doubly dumb; e.g. Big Corn, ethanol, energy independence, the War on Ter...

I had to urinate for the majority of our hellish ninety minute ride to Queens last weekend, and by the time I got into the bathroom my bladd...

I was pleased with the last minute name I thought of for our faculty band's "Rock the Vote" performance: "The Hanging Ch...

Randomly reading recommendations that Amazon selected for me, I found this gem of a sentence-- if you're wondering about the future of p...

A momentous day: a mysterious tall woman ran into my classroom this morning and snapped my picture on her cell-phone camera, and now I know...

After I took a plastic dagger and sheath away from the boys because it cracked and needed gluing, Ian tried to sneak behind my back-- walkin...

They sell the printer cheap and then make the money on the ink cartridges.

My parents took Alex and Ian to their church yesterday for an Easter egg hunt and to meet the bunny himself, but Alex was not duped: he said...

Piracy has been so romanticized that I'm having a hard time explaining to my kids that pirates are thieves -- and often ruthless and san...

Two things:   1) never drive to Queens (we went to the Hall of Science there today, which was nice, but the drive out of a Mad Max movie; 2...

One of Ian's absurdist knock-knock jokes: knock knock . . . who's there? . . . diaper apple . . . diaper apple who? . . . apple di...

Someone put out a huge spread of goodies in the English office, but I had a peanut-butter and jelly sandwich to eat-- so to maximize my cons...

It's official: Ian has toilet-trained himself (and with no encouragement, charts, stars, prizes, or treats-- which Alex thinks is unfai...

Last night I ate a big bowl of peanut butter gelato with sprinkles and chocolate chips on top and it tasted that much better because I was w...

I think we're going with the French door style refrigerator with the freezer on the bottom-- and if anyone has a problem with that, I...

I got up early this morning to finish Persepolis, a graphic novel that was just made into a MAJOR MOTION PICTURE! -- and I'm giving it n...

I was debating what to do with the squirrels in my attic after I catch them in the humane trap I'm going to purchase, but after the taun...

Having my abscess infection scooped out was no bargain, but at least I'll be able to enjoy an episode of "Flight of the Conchords...

This morning I awoke alone in bed and found Catherine asleep downstairs on the couch; I hoped that it wasn't a bout of noxious flatulen...