Sentence of Dave
The Required Amount at the Prescribed Rate (Handcrafted From the Finest Corinthian Leather)
The Test 28: Common Threads?
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Another weird and wonderful episode of The Test this week: Stacey administers a menacing word association quiz she calls Common Thread, and...
Something to Look Forward To
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In the olden days, old people aspired to be wise-- they were the keepers of history, knowledge, and sagacity-- but now, with the rapid pace ...
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Yours For the Taking
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While I generally appreciate leftover beer from a party, someone left two bottles of Traveler Jack-O Pumpkin Shandy in my refrigerator a...
Awkward Dave and the Cheesesteak
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Last weekend, we took a road trip to my brother-in-law's new place just outside of Harrisburg, and I wasn't terribly excited about m...
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This Might Be the Deal
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I highly recommend Dan Carlin's podcast "Common Sense" -- he's logical and knowledgeable, has a great voice, and makes pol...
Bonus: Happy Gheorghemas!
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While not quite as involved as Festivus, we are celebrating Gheorghemas over at Gheorghe: The Blog, so head over and enjoy "Five ...
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The Test 27: Alcohol (the cause of-- and solution to-- all of life's problems)
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I'll use any chance to whip out my favorite Simpson's quotation of all time, and this episode of The Test is no exception-- while ...
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Is There Something Wrong With Us?
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The Pew Research Center did a survey on "U.S. View of Technology and the Future" and one of the questions asked was what futuristi...
Benjamen Walker's Theories About Uber
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I have been listening to Benjamen Walker's Theory of Everything podcast . . . it's the first podcast on a list of favorites by Roman...
I Hope My Kids Don't Read My Blog
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I broke down and bought a Wii U for my kids for Christmas (along with Super Smash Bros) and while this is ostensibly because they are doing ...
Dave Pleads His Case About Being Overwhelmed
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I finished Brigid Schulte's book Overwhelmed: Work, Love and Play When No one Has the Time in the perfect setting: at jury duty, just a...
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Will the Benefits of Global Warming Last through the Winter?
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Usually once fall soccer season ends, that's it for outdoor sports-- aside from snowboarding and sledding-- but this year my son Ian and...
Undefeated (and a turtle) defeat The Affair
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My wife and I put the nix on the first season of The Affair -- despite the good acting, the show is SLOW-- so after seven rather repetiti...
The Test 26: The Moral of the Story (No Napping on the Job)
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You can either rest on your laurels or get off your ass and listen to this week's episode of The Test . . . and you certainly can'...
Let's Get Ready to Coddle!!!!!!!!!!
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The Atlantic article "The Coddling of the American Mind" by Greg Lukianoff and Jonathan Haidt is an excellent and comprehensive ...
Just In Case You Thought You Had Things Under Control
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Just in case you haven't read Plato's "Allegory of the Cave" lately . . . or recently watched The Matrix , here is a fr...
The Music is Coming From Inside the House!
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It was Thanksgiving and we were about to leave the house for the afternoon when I heard music coming from the kitchen-- so I checked the com...
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The Host: Something to Stream on Netflix
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If you're looking for a streaming movie on Netflix that is a little edgy but still fairly appropriate for the whole family (there'...
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Lesotho, Papua New Guinea, Swaziland and USA! USA! USA!
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According to Brigid Schulte, in her book Overwhelmed: Work, Love and Play When No One Has the Time , the United States "ranks dead last...
The Test 25: Phone Smarts
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This week's episode of The Test is a little different . . . Stacey created descriptions of seven hypothetical smart phones-- apps and c...
How Many Tabs is Too Many?
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Today is my wife's birthday-- Happy Birthday Cat!-- and while I'll preserve her feminine mystique and not reveal her exact age, I wi...
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Is It Responsible to Name a Food After a Dangerously Addictive Stimulant Drug?
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My wife made an appetizer for Thanksgiving called Maple Caramel Bacon Crack . . . crack as in the drug crack . . . we had to explain what t...
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This Kid Is Ready For College (Aside From His Grades)
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Friday morning, my ten year old son Ian rode his longboard to Stop & Shop, bought a package of strawberries, made it home without incide...
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When You Leave the Doll's House You Become . . . Overwhelmed
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I finished Henrik Ibsen's play A Doll's House this morning-- if you haven't read it (and I hadn't until now, though many of...
Dick Gibson Puts on Quite a Show
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Stanley Elkin's novel The Dick Gibson Show-- published in 1970-- is the story of an itinerant radioman on an infinite apprenticeship wit...
Do Radical Islamic Terrorists Desire Red Mercury?
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According to urban legend, "red mercury" is a incredibly rare substance which is attracted to gold and repelled by garlic, and it ...
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The Test 24: Stacey Demands (More) Numbers
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Stacey demanded another quiz about numbers and I was more than happy to comply; the result is the best episode of The Test yet . . . Cunnin...
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Sorry Ian, But It's All Downhill From Here
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Normally here at Sentence of Dave I like to focus on the life's negatives -- this is where I do my literary grousing and grapple with ex...
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Forever Phones
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I recently went off my parent's cell phone plan, and since I'm cheap and a disciple of Neal Postman -- and I sincerely haven't m...
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Forever Stamps . . . Literally
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Yesterday, on my wife's instructions, I went to the post office and bought a roll of one hundred Forever Stamps and I had one envelope t...
Dave Unironically Attends a Zumba Class
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After school on Thursday I attended my friend Stacey's renegade zumba class (it's renegade because she's not certified) and I am...
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The World 2.0 Gets Dave All Wound Up
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A perfect confluence of bizarre events nearly brought my brain to its knees recently, but luckily I have this blog where I can mix metaphors...
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The End of an Era . . . The End of Madmen
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I'm very sleepy this morning because we watched the final episode of Mad Men last night, and while I won't reveal any spoilers to t...
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I've Only Known Enrico Palazzo For 27 Years
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Friday night my wife went out with some ladies, and the boys and I were left to our own devices; we decided on take-out burgers and film a...
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An Autumn Miracle
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Last week, I was walking home with the dog, annoyed that when I got back I would have to rake up all the wet leaves on my lawn and bag them-...
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The Test 23: Princess Cunningham
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In this week's episode of The Test , Princess Cunningham quizzes Stacey and I on all things Disney; I do poorly-- which is to be expecte...
The Truth About About Cats & Dogs & Fish & Birds & Pigs
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Although people love to pontificate about the differences between cats and dogs, in a gastronomical sense they are the same: we don't ea...
Tennis for Men?
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I always though a two-handed backhand was for kids and women, but apparently most men are hitting it now as well . . . and while I have a s...
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This Might Be Farewell
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In case I don't make it through the next couple of days, I'd like to thank all my readers for their encouragement and support . . . ...
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Who Needs Chelsea?
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While I was certainly impressed by the breadth of hip restaurants in Chelsea, if you don't feel like schlepping all the way to the city,...
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More Wild News From Dave's Closet!
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Not only did all my white socks disintegrate on the same day, but both my belts -- black and brown-- fell apart within a week . . . so I w...
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The Test 22: Stacey's Songs (Have Still Got It Going On)
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This episode of The Test is another musical clip quiz by Stacey: listen to the song snippets, identify the artists, and then see if you can...
Is Winter Coming?
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Weirdly warm weather continued in New Jersey on Saturday, and to celebrate we played many outdoor sports-- aside from soccer . . . we've...
Reality Break
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On Thursday my wife and I ditched the kids and the dog and all soccer-related events and essentially took a break from reality-- we went to ...
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Instrumental Paradox
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Why is jazz music so good and jazz singing so unbearable?
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At a Loss to Avoid a Gain
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If anyone knows how to avoid eating Halloween candy-- which now resides in giant bowls in my kitchen and is a very attractive nuisance-- wit...
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Allegorical Cacti
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At work on Monday I was called down to the office-- and teachers feel the same way as students when they are put in this position, as usuall...
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Paper Clips, Trombones, Safety Pins, Coat Hangers and Bicycles
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My son Ian forgot his trombone at school, but he did drag home the innards of an old desktop tower style computer because he thought his bro...
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Dave Learns Three Things (and Connects Two of Them)
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I learned two valuable things while listening to Dan Carlin's newest episode of Common Sense : The Show That Should Not Be . . . 1)...
The Test 21: Poker Face Off
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This episode of The Test , which focuses on gambling and probability, might have simply been a straightforward display of Stacey and her bro...
Seriously? Halloween on a Saturday? Combined With Daylight Saving Time? Who Let This Happen?
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I never galvanized the adults in my community to form PAH! (Parents Against Halloween!) and now we're all paying for it, stuck at home ...
Men and Women are a Little Different
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The head of my department recently progressed from looking a little pregnant to looking very pregnant, and she's getting the usual curio...
It's That Most Wonderful Time of the Year . . . Again
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Like the sands of the hourglass, so are the Sentences by Dave . . . and if you visit here daily, then you know to expect run-ons, awkwardnes...
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Obama Almost Makes Dave Happy! But Ultimately Disappoints Him . . .
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President Obama recently spoke out against the amount of "unnecessary" standardized testing in public schools, and proposed a cap ...
Dave Remarks on the World Series!
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Let's go . . . meh.
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Only In America
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My friend Connell brought a special guest to the pub Thursday night-- a geo-political science professor on sabbatical from Israel for a year...
The Test 20: Stars, Caves . . . Whatever
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This is my favorite episode of our podcast so far-- it's a festive mix of knowledge, judgement, ignorance, humor, tantrums, epistemolog...
The End is Nigh
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Yesterday morning, I tried on two different jackets and BOTH of the zippers were broken . . . but my wife tells me there is some seamstress ...
I Quit, Franzen . . . and I Quit Franzen
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Dear Jonathan Franzen, Regarding your new big book, Purity . . . not only was I NOT fooled by your clever ruse , but I'm also NOT foo...
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The Slippery Slope to Dorkville
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My son Alex checked out the Monster Manual , The Player's Handbook , and The Dungeon Master's Guide from the library this weekend, ...
This Beer Tastes Good
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Once again, I've found a beer that tastes really good ( Sixpoint Sensi Harvest ) and once again, I neither have the discriminating pala...
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I Don't Appreciate Your Ruse, Franzen
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I found Jonathan Franzen's 2010 novel Freedom bloated and disagreeable (but I still enjoyed his hyper-realistic style) and I am feel...
The Test 19: Dating Stacey
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In this episode of The Test you'll find out what information you would need to impress Stacey on a hypothetical first date-- it's a...
Could This Be a Game Show?
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I do a lesson with my Composition class on removing the "clutter" from their writing-- I like to teach the lesson just after a st...
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What the Teens are Talking About
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As a high school teacher, I'm privy to the exciting social lives of teenagers . . . here's a snippet of conversation I overheard bet...
TV is Bad For Kids
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Don't be fooled, even if your kid is watching something educational-- like a documentary about philately-- you still have to worry, as n...
Dogs Will be Dogs
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It was yesterday morning, 6 AM, dark and chilly, and I was walking the dog . . . but I was in the home stretch, nearing my driveway-- the do...
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The Test 18: Plants and Things
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This episode of The Test is probably as close to educational as we'll ever come . . . we all performed so well that we didn't even ...
Garage Sale Day!
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There is nothing quite like the mania to which my children and their gang of friends succumb during our town's "Garage Sale Day&quo...
Rock 'n' Roll Mathematics #1
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There's a mathematical paradox in The Fabulous Thunderbird's song "Tuff Enuff" . . . if you work "twenty-four hou...
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Words for Beyond Words
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I finally finished Carl Safina's book Beyond Words: What Animals Think and Feel and it's one of the most powerful and moving things ...
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Read This in the Voice of Stephen Wright
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I finally sprung for a vanity license plate, but I don't want people to know how vain I am, so I got 58T * CA3 .
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Open Letter to Tyreese
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It's the zombie apocalypse and you're trudging through Georgia and the anti-theft tags at Kohls aren't going to trigger any a...
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Dogs and (Sleeping) Kids . . . You've Gotta Love'em
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Each morning, just before I leave for work, I go upstairs and give each of my children a kiss on the forehead-- they're always sound asl...
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Keep On Chewing
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Every season, The Walking Dead ramps up the gore a little more, but my wife and I are unfazed: sixty -plus episodes of zombie apocalypse h...
The Test 17: Financial Literacy (and Idiocy)
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This week's episode of The Test is quick and painless (unlike last week's epic) and special guest Scott and I perform admirably on ...
Woe For the Modern Man
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In 2012, Anne-Mare Slaughter explained "Why Women Still Can't Have It All" and though she took some flak for her hypothesis--...
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Would Gandhi Curb Stomp a Bully?
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On Friday, during the morning announcements, the principal reminded us that it is National Bullying Prevention Month-- and this is certainly...
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Sitcoms and Everything Else: Now and Then
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The difference between watching a sitcom in the 1980's and watching a sitcom in 2015 is this: back then, you were never quite sure what ...
Pathetic Fallacy
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According to weather.com, the Northeast is in "the cone of uncertainty" as far as Hurricane Joaquin is concerned . . . but rea...
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