This Might Be Farewell

In case I don't make it through the next couple of days, I'd like to thank all my readers for their encouragement and support . . . I know you all agree that I am an advanced wordsmith of the highest caliber, but I still don't think I have the lexical dexterity to explain how irritating, annoying and painful the canker sore under my tongue is . . . and while I've tried some of the remedies you have suggested, they don't seem to be working; in fact, I'm sure the sore is growing larger and larger each minute, festering and suppurating vast amount of pus, and in the coming days, I'm sure it will consume the rest of my tongue, then my mouth, then my face, and then my entire body-- I'll be one gigantic frothing sore, and thus unable to write any sentences . . . but it was fun while it lasted.
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4 comments:

  1. zmanNovember 12, 2015 at 11:01 AM

    Your canker is like the festering apple lodged in Gregor Samsa's back. Once you can no longer write sentences you will be of no use to anyone and you will die alone in your room, herpetic and unloved.

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  2. LeckyNovember 12, 2015 at 1:00 PM

    Don't worry, we're fine, we have intern lined up to replace you. He will stop by after school on Mondays from 3:00 - 3:15.

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  3. DaveNovember 12, 2015 at 3:38 PM

    my intern has been writing this sentence for years now . . . i've been on a beach in thailand

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  4. ClarenceNovember 13, 2015 at 12:01 AM

    You might pronounce it "beach," but I don't think that's how you spell it.

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