This summer, I went to the Jersey Shore Premium Outlets to buy more Eddie Bauer hiking pants-- these pants fit me perfectly; they are appropriate for the workplace, the bar, and the trail; and they have one zipper cargo pocket, perfect for a phone or a wallet or a power bar or a one-hitter-- they are, and i am not being hyperbolic, my favorite pants in the world, but to my chagrin, after much searching the Jersey Shore Outlets, and then asking the lady at Columbia, who recommended a great Italian market and sandwich place in Little Silver-- Ferrucci's-- but also informed me that the Eddie Bauer outlet had closed, I sorrowfully resigned myself to the fact that I would never find these pants again; but a few days ago, I took matters into my own hands and found the exact same pants on Amazon-- and there were on sale! thirty-one dollars! and so I bought three pairs, and now I am very happy . . . although if I actually lose some weight, I might have to size down in the waist-- but then they might not be on sale . . . so now I need to decide if I should buy some aspirational pants; the moral: being a materialistic consumer AND a cheapskate is hard work (I've never paid full price for pants, and I'm not going to start now).
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