Dave Visits Two Beaches, Bitches

Over the past two days, I was lucky enough to experience the splendid enchanted isolation of what is basically a private beach on the Outer Banks-- my buddy Whitney's family has a half share in a house that's on the Historic Beach Cottage Row: these are very old, wood-shingled, weather-beaten original beach cottages (many from the 1800s) that are ocean front and essentially have private beach access . . . so while you may be able to spy another family or person here and there, it's mainly you and the sea oats, the dunes, the sand, and the sea (and, in our case, nineteen of your oldest friends-- loud and drunk-- constantly interrupting any chance you might have at listening to the soothing sound of the surf or achieving inner peace and tranquility) and now-- after much driving-- I'm back in Jersey, at the beach-- Bradley Beach in particular-- and the difference is remarkable; I got up early this morning, biked over the bridge to Belmar and then back to Bradley Beach on the boardwalk, and then did some sprints in the sand and took a swim (the water is tropical) and the main difference is people, the density of people . . . people at Jersey beaches get up early and run, bike, kick box, exercise, do you yoga, smoke pot, ride one-wheelers . . . whatever, it's fun and inspirational and always makes me exercise a bit harder than I would have-- there's so many fit people really pushing it; there were also people already set up on the beach-- at 7:30 AM!-- claiming some real estate and ready to put in a full beach day of relaxation and recreation . . . and we are a ten minute walk to the beach, or a short bike ride, but we're close to main street and a plethora of bars, restaurants, distilleries, breweries, laundromats, auto-body shops, the train tracks, a train station, and a park that has music every night . . . while I like the proximity of the ocean and the incredible scenery of the Outer Banks, if I had my druthers of where to relocate, it would be Asbury, Ocean Grove, or Bradley Beach (although one difference that can be annoying is that on Jersey beaches, you need to pay for a badge to be on the beach-- and while sometimes this is not enforced, my wife saw a head lifeguard freaking out about all the people already on the beach at 9 AM-- before the badge people patrol the entrances and he told her, "We have to walk the beach and check! we have to issue citations! These people are stealing services! Stealing services!" and my wife saw a beach badge crackdown go down).