Dave Makes a Split Second Decision (on Stage)

Last night, I got as close to being a rock star as I ever will-- I played guitar in the Faculty Follies House Band in front of nearly a thousand screaming fans-- and at the start of "Detention" (played to the tune of Charlie Puth's "Attention") I exhibited a rare moment of aplomb and competence . . . I had twisted too many knobs on my amplifier and turned on too many effect pedals and the sound coming out of my speaker was an infinite sequence of echoes, but instead of forging ahead, I stopped playing, calmly clicked off my delay pedal with my foot, and then started again, with a much better sound . . . this is the only song that Bob and I didn't write-- the director of the event, Liz, penned this one and the lyrics are great so I've included them below.

Detention (To “Attention” by Charlie Puth)

You’ve been wanderin’, wanderin’, wanderin’, wanderin’
strolling through the halls . . .

And you knew you’d be, knew you’d be, knew you’d be late to class

Now your teacher’s mad, teacher’s mad, teacher’s mad, teacher’s mad -
he’s writing you up

So you take the slip, tear it, and you throw it in the trash.

I know you’ve been in trouble, often before

Like that one time when you cut study hall

And now they’re all up on you, They’ve called your mom

But you act like you just don’t care at all...

You must want detention or maybe ISS?

Maybe you just hate the thought of reading Beowulf

You must want detention,  because you’re here again

Don’t you come to this office enough?

You’ve been on your phone on your phone on your phone
checking on your streaks

When your teacher told you to put it in your bag

You blew her off blew her off blew her off
until she said she’d write you up

Then you threw a fit, made a scene and called her an old hag

I know Snapchat’s important  And Instagram

But can’t you wait until it’s passing time?

Cause now they’re all up on you, calling your dad

Telling him that you just crossed the line.

You must want detention  Or maybe ISS?

Maybe you just hate the thought of doing one more proof

You must want detention  Cause you’re here again

So what the heck should we do with you?

You must want detention Or maybe ISS?

Maybe you just hate the thought of doing one more proof

You must want detention Cause you’re here again

So what the heck should we do with you?