The Required Amount at the Prescribed Rate (Handcrafted From the Finest Corinthian Leather)
A Suggestion So Rational It's Spooky
While I can't figure out exactly where America's stands in the World Obesity Rankings, it's certainly near the top, and so I have simple suggestion that will change the cultural zeitgeist and propel us down the path of national leanness and meanness: on Halloween, kids should have to earn their candy, instead of saying "trick or treat," they should be required to do ten push-ups or a few squat thrusts, or perhaps something more athletic -- like a baby freeze; I'm not sure how to initiate this new Halloween requirement, but I think an added benefit will be that Mischief Night will return with a vengeance (as lately, I haven't seen much mischief at all on Mischief Night . . . I'm going to try to get my boys to bring it back).
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A New Sentence Every Day, Hand Crafted from the Finest Corinthian Leather.
3 comments:
It was called Cabbage Night when I was a kid in Bergen County. We ate Taylor Ham while egging houses and putting shaving cream on cars.
why cabbage night?
Why pork roll?
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