Seven Reasons Kids Should Watch Rocky

I just watched Rocky with my children, and I highly recommend it for young boys, as the film contains some valuable life-lessons for them:

1) if you stop smoking and run around carrying bricks, you will get back into shape;

2) breaking fingers for a sleazy loan shark will get you nowhere;

3) when you get as old as Mickey, no one will understand what you're saying;

4) turtles can choke on moss;

5) working in a meat packing plant is depressing and may lead to arthritis and alcoholism;

6) it's nice to have a recurring theme song;

7) and finally, even if you don't win, as long as you stay on your feet and get beaten to a brain-damaged bloody pulp, then it's still a moral victory and you should be proud of yourself.