The Required Amount at the Prescribed Rate (Handcrafted From the Finest Corinthian Leather)
Hang Around Me And You Might Lose an Eye
I couldn't find my hatchet while we were breaking down our campsite, so I had to figure out some other way to pry the tent stakes from the ground; I decided to use one thick yellow tent stake as a lever to yank the stuck tent stake out of the ground, but when I yanked the plastic cracked and half the stake went flying and hit Ian in the face, which made him cry, but I was glad he didn't lose an eye . . . and then later that day when I was showering off all the camping grit, I decided my hair needed some conditioning, but the conditioner bottle was jammed with dried conditioner, so I squeezed and squeezed-- but to no avail-- the dried chunk would not dislodge, and so I put the conditioner on the shower floor (clogged hole pointing up) and stepped on the bottle and-- of course-- conditioner shot up in a geyser and went into my eye, temporarily blinding me, and making me feel, just for a moment, like one of those rabbits or guinea pigs that had to endure similar lab tests for months on end.
That you would work that hard to apply conditioner to that head of hair makes you the gayest man I know.
ReplyDeletehad similar thought, you should only use conditioner when you run out of shampoo AND hand soap, unless ur gay
ReplyDeleteSeriously. I know you appreciated the coincidence of the ocular occurrences, but the inclusion of your desperate quest to achieve some level of pH balance in your hair is just embarrassing.
ReplyDeletelike the rest of this blog isn't embarrassing?
ReplyDeleteat least you have some hair left maybe that was my problem lack of conditioner i could of saved a couple of strands
ReplyDelete