Sentence of Dave

The Required Amount at the Prescribed Rate (Handcrafted From the Finest Corinthian Leather)

The Internet Has Already Thought of Everything You Think

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After a fun night out in New Brunswick (and an ill-advised late night snack stop at Giovanelli's-- Whitney declared that would be the...
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What Do Squirrels, Candy, and Acorns Have in Common? They're All Delicious!

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Today was the first crisp fall day of the season and the squirrels were just brazen-- the acorns have fallen from the oak trees on our stree...
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Welcome to the (five day workweek) Jungle

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I just completed the first five day week of the school year . . . brutal, just brutal, but listening to the smooth sounds of Jungle's ne...
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Dave Goes on an Anti-Homework Crusade

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I'm exhausted from writing various emails about violations of my school district's homework policy, in the hopes of getting an extre...
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Dave Throws This Sentence into the Volcano

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I hereby vow to sacrifice these very words and this very sentence to the irate, pus-filled, and vengeful Goddess of Canker Sore, in the hope...

To Coddle or Not To Coddle

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My take on Greg Lukianoff and Jonathan Haidt's new book The Coddling of the American Mind: How Good Intentions and Bad Ideas Are Setting...
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Am I THAT Parent?

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I'm out of words . . . yesterday I wrote a six paragraph email to my son's Honors English teacher about the amount of homework he ha...
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Bedeviled by the Beverage

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A weird Sunday . . . my mind felt foggy and possessed all day, perhaps because I was in the thrall of that dirty old Jersey devil . . . or p...

Hey Jack Kemp . . . The NFL is the European Socialist Sport!

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The new episode of Freakonomics (How to Stop Being a Loser)  is another reminder that the NFL-- the world's most lucrative sports league...
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To Veal or Not to Veal?

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During a recording session, Cunningham, Stacey and I all proudly virtue signaled the fact that we don't eat veal . . . but perhaps this ...
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Dear People Who Still Read Books

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Dear Readers, I'd like to give my highest recommendation for Julie Schumacher's novel Dear Committee Members (and while I know tha...
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A Poetic Celebration of Yom Kippur (and the fact that most New Jersey public schools have off today)

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While the Jewish folks in Jersey atone for a year's worth of sin the rest of us Gentiles enjoy sleeping in . . . except for me, I just...

Life is Disgusting: Dawn to Dark Edition

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We were practicing showing and not telling in Creative Writing this morning, and I like to practice what I preach, so here goes: we'...
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Soccer Triathlon

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I completed my first soccer-triathlon of the fall season yesterday: I played soccer, watched soccer, and coached soccer . . . I played pick-...
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R.I.P. JJ McClure (and his Masterful Mustache)

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Sadly, Burt Reynolds has taken his last wild ambulance ride and finally joined his buddy Dom DeLuise at the Great Cannonball Run in the S...
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Primer for the Clueless

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Charlie Sykes tweeted this image with the caption: Kind of amazed this pr campaign wasn’t enough to save Alex Jones on Twitter a...

Maturity is Admitting You're Stupid

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This is hot off the press: so fifty-four minutes ago . . . at the end of middle school soccer practice, my son Ian and some of his friends d...
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Bunnies on the Border

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In  Jeff Vandermeer's second book in the Southern Reach Trilogy, Authority , it feels as if the British version of The Office has  ...

Brain Melt

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School has truly begun and my brain is taxed . . . I'm teaching four different classes this year (or preps, as we teachers like to call ...
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The Test 115: Good Fences Make Good Podcasts

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This week on our podcast  The Test , Stacey quizzes us on various and significant walls and we perform admirably (aside from when Cunningham...
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