You Can Return Yogurt If It Looks Weird

I opened a large tub of Chobani Greek yogurt and it looked weird-- chunky and striated instead of smooth and glistening-- and though it was probably fine to consume, my wife told me I could "take it back," despite the fact that I didn't have a receipt; I went to the Stop & Shop Customer Service desk and the lady there took it back no questions asked, despite the fact that I was dressed like a slob (gray sweatpants and a gray hoodie) and she didn't even give me a chance to use the words "chunky and striated," which I memorized because I thought I would be interrogated a bit before she allowed me to get a new tub of yogurt . . . so the real question is this: if you're wearing a jacket and tie, can you return a brown avocado?

4 comments:

zman said...

Do you own a jacket and tie? If you do, would you wear them with your sweatpants?

Last time zfamily returned something it was fish that had a few worms in it from Kings. Upon reaching the customer service counter zson bellowed "Hey Kings, give us back our money this fish is messed up!" zwoman showed the fish and the worms to the customer service guy, who beckoned over the fishmonger, who said "Those aren't worms, their parasites." zwoman replied "You can call them whatever you want, but I'm getting my money back." She got the money back.

zman said...

"their" = "they're"

Dave said...

at least they listened to your story. i just wanted to say "chunky and striated." we had worms in cod from costco and my wife hasn't eaten cod since, which doesn't make any sense . . .

zman said...

Eat the worm.

A New Sentence Every Day, Hand Crafted from the Finest Corinthian Leather.