Nether Report

I ran ten miles in the cold this morning, and I'm very sad to report that there was some chafing.

Happy Birthday 2x

After several hours at the emergency room, Catherine received two excellent birthday gifts: Alex tested negative for bacterial infection and she learned how to spell "petechiae."

The Physics of Evaporation

Some people find it odd that after showering, I dry myself with three towels instead of one, but the fact is that three slightly damp towels dry out in a shorter time than one sopping wet towel (and I'm sure if I was less hirsute, one towel would suffice).

Boing! Bang!

Last night, at the Chinese restaurant, my brother gave my three year old son a super-ball-- which he immediately bounced into the booth next to ours, where it hit an Asian woman in the head-- and when she amiably ducked down to retrieve it, she banged her head on the underside of the table (and for some reason I apologized to her, although technically it wasn't my fault that she hit her head).

Closing Statement

My wife and I got into a debate over how much clothing our children needed to wear during the chilly but very short trek from our front porch to the car (she thought they needed a fleece, and I thought otherwise) but I cut the discussion short: I hustled the boys into the cold, yelled "You don't know anything about the laws of physics!" and then slammed the door before she could reply.

Sharks Hurt, Sharks Scar, Sharks Wound and Mark

Today, I asked my students to list and rank things that worried them: one girl found shark attacks more worrisome than the fear of never finding true love.

Apparently, This Is Not a Viable Excuse To Be Lazy

When I do mind-numbingly menial tasks, such as bagging raked leaves, putting away laundry, or washing the dishes, I get a vague feeling of anxiety in my stomach that rapidly moves through my abdomen, constricting my heart and lungs, but this isn't considered a valid reason to quit these tasks (or avoid them altogether.)

The Ur Sentence

I am shopping for a new digital camera because my wife has a habit of leaving things on the roof of our car.
A New Sentence Every Day, Hand Crafted from the Finest Corinthian Leather.